|Another entry for all you sleepless readers later on tonight...
||[Mar. 15th, 2005|02:40 pm]
I wish I could write in this thing at 4am like I used to do... then again that was when i had insomnia... and didn't go to sleep until what 6 or 7. Anywho... winter sucks... it's very depressing... and a lot of things have been depressing me, i feel like a horrible person towards different people, and my mom and i still fight. I'm not going to bitch about my mom though... except say that it is totally fucking out of her league, place, and right to go see fred and his family down in Maryland next month. Oh my god that is my fucking ex, and i despise him... she doesn't even try to think that that might be awkward for me... im sure they will talk about me, and i don't like it... i wanna just send a nice little warhead over to Cambridge Maryland next month. Burn.... i mean was it bad enough that i got yelled at by fred's mom. I'm sorry if your son has a fucking "so called nerous breakdown" because i dont want him back. (of course she heard from HIm differently. Hmm I wonder why). Maybe he should also tell his new girlfriend about putting a move on me and kissing me the last time and telling me that he would get back togehter with me.... which i turned down.he made ME cry... because I was played... and i wish he would perish. fuck little boys like you fred. and fuck anyone who believes your sorry little whiney ass... and god i feel bad for your girlfriend... if she has a head on her shoulders, maybe shell realize what a fuckin cry-baby you are. So YEAH>>>>> thats one biggggg reason why im pissed at my mom... and tons of others of course.... and she STIL HAS NO PATIENCE WITH ME.
Life is good though ill admit. and i dont work at domi fuckin nos anymore. thank fucking god... i have a life again. their pizza sucks anyway. i work at this place merendinos now... same town... better pizza, better tips, less trashy-ass customers.
As for within the last week.... Hmmm well Jess came up Saturday night and Kim stayed over too.... then the next day they took Eddie with them, and watched him all day. ____ ( i wont mention their name) started poppin pills and alchol and the mixture fucker her up, and my friend had to call 911.... and now they are in a mental institution for at least a month. i feel real bad...... real worried. its not what she deserved... cos it must suck... but if it will get her from popping pills and getting high off harmful things (WEed is ok lol mmm) then ill be happy if it works. im only concerned and so is jess. thats why she did what she did. I just felt horrible when i got the phonecall from jess. See I wasnt with them at the time. I went up to see Jon. I hadnt seen him in more than a couple weeks and i missed my friend... so i went out for like 6 hours. I came back early.... and jess had to stay at the hospital which sucked. We went to Panera and watched Fantasia.... Fantasia being stoned would be so awesome. or shrooms. ive not done shrooms yet... soon enough though.
Then last night, I went to Cluck-U with Ed and lil ed in the afternoon b4 work, and i rode around with them, until jessica came to pick me up. we wound up going back to my apartment though, because there was nothing in godsname to do, i didnt feel like going to the mall.... againnnnn lol. ive been there like 5 times or mmore in the last few weeks. argh. i remember thats all i used to do back in highschool.... walk around listening to my headphones and bumping into people.Well, I'm gonna jet.... I've got absolutely nothing to do here at school, and I'm going to go smoke now.... then leave... of course. :-P